This thread is a take off of the old Jeff Foxworthy "You must be a Redneck if..." routine only directed toward Paper Modelers. I guess you could be both, a redneck and a paper modeler in which case you would probably use a hatchet to cut out parts.
Example:
You must be a paper modeler if you... dig through you neighbors garbage in the middle of the night looking for empty cereal boxes.
-OR-
You must be a paper modeler if you... are on a first name basis with the guy at office max who refills your ink cartridges.
Let's keep this list going...It will be funny to see what else defines a "real" paper modeler.