#11
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Pilot Gripe: "Evidence of hydraulic leak behind number 3 engine."
Corrective Action: "Evidence removed" |
#12
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Is a man working underneath a Russian Airliner "Labouring under an Ilyushin" ?
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Sprogs |
#13
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Classic Sprog, the more so since ilyushins always seem to have oil leaks and rattly and loose bits!!!!
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The SD40 is 55 now! |
#14
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A P-3C Orion was cruising along performing RADAR sweeps when some cocky F-14 decided to have some fun with him.
The F-14 came along side the P-3C and said, "Hey, watch this" He proceeded to perform a barrel roll around the P-3C. Then he said, "Check this out" and performed several other stunts around the P-3C as if he was standing still. The P-3C replied, "That's nothing! Watch this!" and his radio went silent. 20 minutes later he came back and said, "Top that!" The F-14 said, "What did you do?" The P-3C replied, "I got out of my seat, walked aft, put on a fresh pot of coffee, took a leak in the head, then I waited for the coffee to finish and refilled my cup. Then I had a bit of a stretch, touched my toes and cleaned up the coffee I spilled." The P-3C didn't even see which direction the F-14 took off in. |
#15
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Cessna pilot chatting with a nice girl.
Girl: "So, what plane do you fly?" Pilot: "Well, do you see the big four-engine freighter over there? That's a C-130. I fly a C-150." |
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#16
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flight attendant to passengers, "in the event of a water landing your seat acts as a buoyancy device..." Passenger translation, if we crash into the ocean these act as fishing bobbers for the sharks...
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#17
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Height ? What height ?
Back in the 60's I was in the ATC for a while. I was lucky enough to do a course in the flight simulator. I admit I was nervous, very, but I submitted my flight plan, got in and they sealed the hatches.
I must admit that I felt as if an angel was flying with me that day, take-off, flight, landing, all seemed perfectly simple and easy. I emerged expecting congratulations on my passing the test, but one look at the assembled officers told me something was VERY wrong. "That", said the Warrant Officer, "Was a near perfect flight, Cadet Sparrow" "I say nearly perfect because you flew perfectly well until you flew UNDER Salisbury Plain, rather than the usual over" "May I suggest that you check and set your Altimeter before you retake the test?" Liz
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Sprogs |
#18
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you guys are great as you made my day!
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#19
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Somewhere I have a long list of such "quips', but can't find it. I do remember two, especially...."the only time you have too much fuel is when you are on fire!", and, "as a pilot walked away from a flaming crash, an excited witness shouted "What Happened". The pilot responded "I don't know, I just got here myself!"
Fun reading! Look forward to more! |
#20
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Quote:
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