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  #61  
Old 11-05-2018, 11:19 PM
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Robotaleem Robotaleem is offline
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dear god what have i done
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  #62  
Old 11-07-2018, 10:21 PM
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luke strawwalker luke strawwalker is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Neilio View Post
No more calls, please! We have a winner!
Yep... Like! OL J R
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Bad Jokes, Folks-1aalukeskywalkerlike.jpg  
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  #63  
Old 11-08-2018, 02:03 PM
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Miles Linnabery Miles Linnabery is offline
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Dear Ann:
For next all hollows eve Scale the model up in size to fit you like a bathing suit
Grin
Miles
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  #64  
Old 11-08-2018, 04:16 PM
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GaryPilsworth GaryPilsworth is offline
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Tom, Dick and Harry were sitting in a bar enjoying a few quiet drinks,
when they decided to get in on the Christmas raffle. Since the raffle was
for charity, they bought five tickets each. When the raffle was drawn a few
days later, they each won a prize. Tom won the first prize - a year's
supply of gourmet spaghetti sauce. Dick was the winner of the second prize
- a six-month supply of extra-long gourmet spaghetti. And Harry won the
sixth prize - a toilet brush. The next time they met at the bar, Harry
asked the others how they were enjoying their prizes. "Great" said Tom. "I
love spaghetti". "Me too" replied Dick. "And how's the toilet brush,
Harry?" "Not so good" Harry groaned "I reckon I'll go back to toilet paper".
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  #65  
Old 11-08-2018, 08:00 PM
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Robotaleem Robotaleem is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GaryPilsworth View Post
Tom, Dick and Harry were sitting in a bar enjoying a few quiet drinks,
when they decided to get in on the Christmas raffle. Since the raffle was
for charity, they bought five tickets each. When the raffle was drawn a few
days later, they each won a prize. Tom won the first prize - a year's
supply of gourmet spaghetti sauce. Dick was the winner of the second prize
- a six-month supply of extra-long gourmet spaghetti. And Harry won the
sixth prize - a toilet brush. The next time they met at the bar, Harry
asked the others how they were enjoying their prizes. "Great" said Tom. "I
love spaghetti". "Me too" replied Dick. "And how's the toilet brush,
Harry?" "Not so good" Harry groaned "I reckon I'll go back to toilet paper".
LMAO this was too good
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"The best landings are the ones you cannot walk away from" - David Windestål
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  #66  
Old 11-09-2018, 06:19 AM
JohnGay JohnGay is offline
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Many years ago, when I was having a hard time making ends meet, I used to go around our neighborhood collecting soda cans to turn in as scrap aluminum.
I would spend hours roaming the neighborhood with a "borrowed" shopping cart collecting as many soda cans as I could.
After it got dark I would head home and start crushing the soda cans. I would spend hours and hours just mindlessly crushing soda cans, in the same way they were crushing my will to live.
It was soda pressing.
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  #67  
Old 11-09-2018, 01:51 PM
JohnGay JohnGay is offline
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I'm sure everyone here is familiar with Sin City.
But does anyone know Den City?



It's Mass over Volume.
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  #68  
Old 11-09-2018, 02:28 PM
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SCEtoAUX SCEtoAUX is offline
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Good one. Mass over volume.
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  #69  
Old 11-09-2018, 04:15 PM
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GaryPilsworth GaryPilsworth is offline
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A man was just waking up from anaesthesia after surgery, and his wife was
sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said "You're
beautiful". Then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say
that, so she stayed by his side. A few minutes later, his eyes fluttered
open and he said "You're cute!" The wife was disappointed because instead
of "beautiful" it was now "cute". She said "What happened to 'beautiful'?"
The man replied "The drugs are wearing off!"
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  #70  
Old Yesterday, 03:17 PM
ricomon35 ricomon35 is offline
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Cain wanted to be like his brother....

But, he wasn't Abel.
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