Sad story

[Andrew zippy]

At an old man's funeral a woman sees his son looking very sad, so she goes up to him.
"Don't feel too bad, I hear your father died peacefully."
"Yes he did," he replied, "but I feel so guilty!"
"Why's that?" she asks.
"Well when I last visited him in hospital he was all hooked up to a life support machine. But he kept saying to me "I can't stand it, I can't stand it...please turn it off, turn it off!"
"How sad," the woman tried to comfort him. "So what did you do?"
"Oh, in the end I couldn't bear his pleading with me, so I turned the life support machine off."
"Now I'm sure you did the right thing," she said, patting him on the shoulder.
"Not really," he replied...."it was only when I turned to leave that I saw his television was on!"

[spaceagent-9]

a blonde and a redhead were talking about their dating experiences, the red head exclaimed to the braggard blonde ''I slept with a Brazilian!!'' the blonde said, '' omg, you harlot...''
she stopped and thought a moment, ''um.....how much is a bra-zillion again?''

[lancer525]

Pierre and Philippe were sitting in a park on the edge of their small French hamlet, when Pierre suddenly jumped up and exclaimed, "I am going to ask Monique to marry me!"

Philippe shook his head and said, "Mon dieu! How could you think of such a thing? Monique is the town harlot! She has bedded everyone in the whole village!"

Pierre patted his friend on the back and said, "It is okay, mon ami... It is a small village!"

[Cybergrinder]

A seal walks into a club....

[rickstef]

Lets keep the jokes at the G level please, this is a family forum

[Cybergrinder]

Ooops. Love the signature Rickstef